Allergies

I have developed allergies. Poop.

I do not know to what exactly I am allergic. All I know is that my eyes are watery and itchy, my throat is clogged and uncomfortable, and my nose is sore and runny. If these symptoms sounds familiar to you, my sincere condolences.

I woke up this morning all cloggy and gross, but not a "I'm so getting a cold" gross, a different kind of gross. Yesterday my eyes had been red and itchy, and this morning was the same. So I took some antihistamines and decided to go in to work.

I have been so lackadaisical at work today, just filing and trying not to fall asleep. Ian and I have been bonding over boring office work, you know, the usual filing and data inputting and staring at a screen for so long you're afraid you'll be cross-eyed forever. I've had to keep my D&G shades on inside because the computer screen is way too bright to look at. It's been an interesting fashion statement apparently - everybody walks by me in the office, and it's always a "Wow, are you trying to make some sort of statement?" Yes. Yes, I am. My statement is that I am itchy and uncomfortable, so make fun of me at your own peril.

But Shila and Parwaneh have both told me that I should wash my eyes out with tea to feel better. Um, what? Isn't tea an astringent? Do I really want that cleansing my eyeballs? Apparently it's an old Persian remedy, so I'm waiting for the tea to cool off enough that I can pour it into my eyesockets without searing them. I'll let you know the results...

.....................

Alrighty, it's half an hour later, and I have garnered some valuable insights:
1. Try to find an actual eye wash station. It's much easier than pouring tea into your eye with a spoon.
2. If you're going to try the spoon manuever, make sure to be careful not to actually jab yourself in the eye with the spoon. It sort of defeats the purpose of helping your eyes when you accidentally blind yourself.
3. Make sure the tea is tepid. NOT HOT. This is extremely important. Again, you don't want to accidentally blind yourself by scalding your eyeballs.
4. Take your shirt off. You think I'm kidding, but who wants to try and explain why you have tea stains on your shoulders and collar afterwards?

All joking aside, my eyes really do feel quite a bit better now. I must have washed out all the offending materials. But I'm still going to leave the shades on. Now they're a fashion statement.
Like I always say, "The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades!"